25 things I love about my "turkey on rye"

In the interest of solidarity with some amazing woman whom I am lucky enough to call friends, I am posting my 25 favorite things about my husband--an immigrant who has been mandated for deportation.

As an aside, because my husband is Muslim and cannot eat pork I am altering the terminology from "ham sandwich" to "turkey on rye." I don't think he would appreciate being compared to a ham sandwich. Additionally, I'm somewhat squeamish about comparing any man to a piece of meat and Khalid will probably feel the same way. But I think he will forgive me if I compare him to halal deli meat. I figure if I am going to liken him to a piece of meat than this is the least I can do!

Sorry if these references don't make sense at the moment. I will go into a brief explanation momentarily.

So, here is the scene...a very well written story was posted in the NY Daily News entitled "American-born wives married to U.S. deported or banned spouses band together via online networks." A link is available below if you would like to read the full article. Someone with a hatred of immigrants decided that he was going to trash talk in the comments section all of these courageous women who left behind everything familiar to start a new life in a different country. According to this misguided person " a woman will marry a ham sandwich."

Read more:

http://www.nydailynews.com/lifestyle/2011/07/03/2011-07-03_americanborn_wives_married_to_us_deported_or_banned_spouses_band_together_via_on.html#ixzz1RMJHSzrh

So, here are my 25 reasons why I love "my turkey on rye."

1) He is one of the few men in my life who look past my weight and see the beautiful person within. He makes me feel special, loved and desirable.

2) He has the patience of a saint. No matter how exasperated, annoyed or impatient I am Khalid is always able to keep his cool! His unflappable demeanor always puts me at ease.

3) Whenever I ask him to...he will always buy me chocolate...no questions asked. (Although he would probably say that buying me chocolate during "those times of the month" is an exercise in self-preservation!)

4) He always does the dishes after we have dinner. That is such a Godsend because I hate doing the dishes!

5) There is not one superficial or mean-spirited bone in the man's body. He never trash-talks or talks down to anyone.

6) Khalid is grounded and centered. He personifies the word Zen. I never knew that there existed men who were so calm, serene and grounded. As a result, I have become grounded--well...at least most of the time. People do comment on how much more confident and centered I have been since being married.

7) Khalid understands that when I get bad news--particularly in regards to his immigration difficulties--that I need to completely fall apart first and then I can pick up the pieces and trudge onward with a fighting spirit. I have no idea why this is part of my personality, but it is.

8) He puts up with all my feminist outbursts about inequality, racism, misogyny, violence against women, poverty, globalization, imperialism, xenophobia, etc. Not many men would be able to handle such feminist sensibilities but Khalid does. Obviously being married to a strong and opinionated woman does not in any way emasculate him.

9) Khalid shares the same eccentric, goofy and child-like sense of humor as
I do. It has been exhilarating to find someone who laughs at my "jokes".

10) Khalid's skin tone is the most beautiful shade of warm brown. I love to look at him. I once lamented to his sister that Khalid doesn't like to have his picture taken and she replied it is probably because he feels his skin is too dark. Well-- my love, if your reading this I absolutely adore your skin color and I wouldn't want it changed for anything! You are so handsome!

11)He graciously accepts my dysfunctional family and never complains when we go over to spend time with them. (He is a saint! I think I mentioned this before!)

12) He is extremely open-minded and shares many of my progressive viewpoints! This also indicates that he is extremely intelligent! hehehe...

13) He is extremely curious about everything!

14) Khalid loves music...all kinds of music but especially Peter Murphy! I think I literally fell in love with him when I played my favorite Peter Murphy song and he loved it. I knew at that moment that the man had discriminating taste. (Not many people know who Peter Murphy is...but anyone who does becomes an instant friend!)

15) He takes care of my car. Yes, although I am a feminist-- I still don't like cars, don't care about cars and don't know how to maintain a car.(Other than making sure the darn thing has gas.) Thank goodness Khalid loves cars and doesn't mind giving my car the TLC it deserves.

16) I love in the morning--just about every morning--before we get up for the day that he turns on his back and lets me snuggle and sleep on his chest with his arm around my shoulder. It's such a simple thing but its one of my favorite daily rituals.

17) He is just so gosh-darned cute! Which is a good thing because he often teases me about everything. I always reply: "well..it's a good thing that you are cute!"

18) He always knows when I am upset. I don't know how he knows but he is always perceptive. Even when I'm trying to be stoic. Actually, this can be rather annoying too...hmmmmm...

19) He makes a great pancake and turkey bacon breakfast!

20) He always kisses me when he leaves and when he comes home. And I get numerous hugs through the day. This is amazing to me because my parents hardly ever touched each other when I was growing up. It used to seem normal to me...but not now that I have lived with Khalid.

21) He is Muslim. Khalid's sense of graciousness, serenity, respect for all living beings, humility and integrity can be attributed--in large measure-- to his upbringing in Islam. Although most Americans think of Muslims as being extremists, violent and conservative I can say with certainty this is a misguided stereotype and nothing more.

22) He is interested in ghosts and crop circles! Although I generally don't put much faith in the existence of paranormal oddities I do indulge an interest in these two subjects! And its wonderful to be able to share this with him and not be considered delusional!

23) His smile. I swear that man could charm the pants off the Venus De Milo statue. That is if she wore pants-- which she doesn't. Mostly it's just a billowing, gossamer sheet that barely covers her lower half. Well...anyways...

24) He never gets upset if I don't keep up with my set of household chores!

25)He picked me! He didn't have to but he did! That says it all!