"Other people's baggage"

The title of this post was borrowed from a phrase written on a blog maintained by a good friend of mine. Her name is Giselle Stern Hernandez and her husband was deported to Mexico back in 2000. A few months later she left her homeland in the United States to join him.

Giselle is a multi-talented artist who travels across the States and Mexico to perform a monologue piece she created about her exiled experience and the consequences of her husband's deportation. I highly recommend her blog and will include a link.

After reading a particular post on Giselle's blog: The Deportees Wife entitled "When Dialogue is Pointless." I was particularly struck by a specific phrase that Giselle wrote. The phrase was "other people's baggage" It was written in response to how some people miscontrue the fundamental message of her monologue, or make uneducated judgments about Giselle, her personality and lifestyle--in addition to forming opinions about her husband. This oftentimes happens even before they attend her show and is based upon sound bites and posters.

I am often confronted by "other people's baggage" when I engage in dialogue with individuals about my husband's immigration problems. I never know exactly how people think about our story, unless they are completely forthright --and that seldom happens. I often get exclamations of empathy and "I can't believe this is happening in America." Oftentimes I feel people within my inner circle are sympathetic to a point--but only because Khalid is someone they know or have heard about--and because he is my husband. Otherwise, this sympathy does not extend to other immigrants with similar circumstances.

People come with "baggage". I come with "baggage." This is a fundamental truth about human behavior. Many things can contribute to the accumulation of baggage including history, media and personal experiences. We, as educators and activists, can never know what kind of baggage the people with whom we engage in dialogue are carrying. Some people are so burdened by their own baggage that they will never make the effort to understand our stories. Luckily, some will. These are the people who put down their baggage long enough to pick up somebody else's.

And there will be others who may not "get it now" but through maturity and additional knowledge may "get it later." Unfortunately, some people will "get it" only when they or a loved one experience the deportation of someone close to them. This is the time when people like Giselle and I need to put down our baggage; and pick up somebody else's.

http://thedeporteeswife.wordpress.com/